Reasons to Write

I vaguely remember the night in 2009 when I was sitting in front of my computer with a similar feeling of emptiness that I have so often experienced since childhood. 

The feeling that brought thoughts like, What's all this for? What are we all living for? If we are all going to die, then who is taking in all these experiences? Our brains will turn to ashes or become food for maggots depending upon the religion one follows. 

The memories stored in our brains would be gone. The only thing that makes us identify as ourselves are our memories and they are so easily damaged or manipulated. If our memories are so fragile and there is no absolute guarantee that they are unalterable, then who are we actually? I mean it's possible to lose all our memories due to some unfortunate disease or accident, then what would remain. 

What is our true essence?

As I was going through this wormhole of thought process, I decided to post something like the purpose of our existence on blogger. That was the first post I ever made. To this day, I am no closer to finding the answer to that question. And I kept writing on and off after that, I think till 2017.

I could not write anything after that since I was unable to focus or just lost interest. Even now, I am pushing myself a lot as I write this. It's not a lack of ideas or thoughts, I believe it's the effort of putting them into words. 

Also, it's the nature of the job that I do for a living that leaves me exhausted not because it demands a lot of intellectual effort. In fact, it's the opposite, it is dull and boring, but it takes away a good amount of my time. This is a problem I am now actively trying to solve. I hope to create a source of income where I don't have to work for somebody else so that I have time left to pursue my interests, one of them being writing.

But why write? What do I have to say? A lot if I start thinking. I mean I don’t know if it would amount to anything or not, but I have learned the hard way that it is not for me to decide. I should just let myself go and hand over the fate of ideas or thoughts I have in the hands of the universe. At least there would be no regret that I did not do what I should have when I had the chance.

Obviously, writing cannot be just for the sake of it. When I am writing my mind must be clear of all the evils that plague us. It’s very easy and tempting to give in to the darkness that resides within all of us. I hope that whatever I write means something and does not cause pain or suffering to anyone.

I hope that through this medium I can bring forth some meaningful ideas to life and in the end when I am gone, there would be a trace of me left in this ocean of the world wide web.

“People disappear when they die. Their voice, their laughter, the warmth of their breath. Their flesh. Eventually their bones. All living memory of them ceases. This is both dreadful and natural. Yet for some there is an exception to this annihilation. For in the books they write they continue to exist. We can rediscover them. Their humor, their tone of voice, their moods. Through the written word they can anger you or make you happy. They can comfort you. They can perplex you. They can alter you. All this, even though they are dead. Like flies in amber, like corpses frozen in the ice, that which according to the laws of nature should pass away is, by the miracle of ink on paper, preserved. It is a kind of magic.” ― Diane Setterfield, The Thirteenth Tale

Religion - Fiction or Fact?

"Gravity will not stop existing if one stopped believing in it. However, Gods will stop existing if one stopped believing in them."

Imagine this: Every human living on this planet suddenly wakes up one day, with no knowledge of any religion, its rituals, temples, mosques, churches, books, songs, hymns, and almost everything that is related to religion in any way.

What do you think then happens to the innumerable Gods and their eternal truths about life, to the idea of hell and heaven, to the beliefs of social stratification systems, to the myriad number of rituals?

It would not be an exaggeration to say that the so dearly believed ideas of religion will stop existing from that moment onward. Why? Simple, because they are beliefs and they exist only if people believe in them. 

To understand this, take for example, gravity. It exists not because we believe in it but because it is real and its existence can be proven by evidence - and even if we forget the concept of gravity, gravitational effects would not stop.

To further stress the point, consider the fact that homo sapiens (that is, our species!) have existed on this planet for close to 200,000 years now and acquired cognitive abilities (ability to think, imagine, create myths) only 70,000 years ago. And, during this time, many civilizations of sapiens were born and died, and along with them died many religions. Their Gods, their temples and their texts are now artefact - which we often look at with amusement. And even have contempt for their teachings as per today's values (e.g. Code of Hammurabi, c.1776 BC, says the following, "If a man strike a free-born woman so that she lose her unborn child, he shall pay ten shekels for her loss" and "If the woman die, his daughter shall be put to death").

Were religions and Gods of those civilizations not eternal? Were the values taught by them not universal and to be true always? The people who lived under those laws certainly believed so and followed them with sincerity. But, where are these so called eternal religion and laws now - some in museums, some still in ground and may or may not even be discovered.

Then, what of the eternal laws and beliefs of the religions of present we so strongly follow and live our life by. If the very existence of these religions is just based on belief and not in reality, then why are they being passed on as eternal truths? And, how is it even possible for these contradicting religions to be true at the same time? And, if these religions are eternal truths, then why are they mostly imposed during an impressionable age when a child is not even aware if he/ she needs to question? And, also why the followers of these religions use threat of violence to make other people stay in a religion or not say anything against their religion if they really believe them to be eternal truths? Do we ever see a scientist going out with an AK-47 to convince people to believe in gravity? No. We don't.

What if an asteroid were to strike earth in some immediate future and it leads to destruction of all of planet's life as we know, and in some distant future life begins again and one more time leads to evolution of cognitive and intelligent beings (who may or may not look like us), and they dig up our temples, mosques, find scriptures, study our religions in an objective way, what conclusion would they draw from our practices, about our "eternal truths"? Would they look at our religions the same way we look at the religions of the sapiens who lived before us?

Think!

Caste System

System of brainwashing people for centuries

Imagine an American or an European meeting two Indians for the first time. One of the Indian happens to be from a higher caste and the other from a lower caste. How do you think the foreign national will treat them?

I guess we can safely assume that he/ she will treat both of them the same way. But why would he/ she not treat them differently? What is it which does not let him/ her not see the caste of the individual and treat them as per the hierarchy of caste?

Well the answer is pretty simple, it is because the foreigner has not been brainwashed with the non-sense of caste. He/ she sees both of them as human beings belonging to the same human species of homo sapiens born the same way having the same potential and capabilities as every other human on this planet.

In India, we have this system of designating people to certain status in society just by being born. Caste of the family is passed on to the new born child. If he/ she is born in a Brahmin (designated as the highest caste) family then he/ she is as good as to have been touched by the hand of God and if he/ she happens to be born in a family of Lower Caste (Untouchables - not even allowed a place in the caste system) then he/ she is to be shunned like plague. As it is clear, "there is no merit" in these designations, they are as arbitrary as either winning a lottery or losing it altogether.

It is believed in the Hindu religion that you get birth in a certain caste on account of your actions in previous births. (This is such bullshit - which is evident from the fact that how come this system happens to be applicable to only the humans living in India or following Hindu religion - what about the rest of human population? Are they beyond these eternal laws? Why do they not get judged by these divine laws? How is it any different from the Bible which said that Blacks are to be treated as slaves? How is it any different from the Quran which accepts slavery?)

This inadequacy itself is a reason enough to discard this caste system as a practice which is not only disgusting but reduces a mass of population to sub-human levels. (Curious: Do the Hindus check for caste when they take blood donation? No.)

Just imagine this: A child who is just born will be treated like shit for the rest of his/ her life by the accident of birth in a certain family due to no fault of his/ her.

This is the Indian society we live in, which destroys the confidence and potential of its own people by placing them on a social ladder just by the accident of birth. Those who are placed on the top feel proud and those at the bottom or some not even on the ladder feel worthless - this is not at all adjudged by the capabilities but just by being born in certain families.

So, essentially, whereas in USA or other western countries, people would say that no matter where you are born you have the potential to be great and achieve big things, we in India say that certain people just by accident of birth are superior and others are lesser human beings - thus making some complacent about their capabilities and some told that they are no good.

In conclusion, people who believe in caste are no less brainwashed than those jihadi terrorists blowing up buildings. Here the only difference is that instead of blowing up buildings, these people are destroying the nation by dehumanizing their own countrymen/ women. And they do it daily.

Reservation and Merit

In order to counter the discrimination faced by the so-called lower castes and untouchables, the govt provided reservations as a part of its affirmative actions policy - which made the so-called upper castes forcibly accept them in their environment - where they were not once allowed access to educational institutions and govt jobs, where, if by any luck they got admissions they would be failed just because of caste - now had access.

It was never a question of merit, the lower castes and untouchables were not or even now are not welcomed and looked at with different perceptions by most people - merit does not even figure. Yet these so-called upper castes would say that compete on merit, why do you ask for reservation?

It seems that they are right on this point. Let there be competition on the basis of merit. Let there be a ban on caste names, caste itself, and let there be marriages on the basis of merit and not caste. The day this happens, then there would be no need for a reservation because there would be no caste.

But, is it really possible that the so-called upper castes would give up their privileges for which they had to "literally" make no efforts. What have they done to claim being called a Brahmin or a Kshatriya and demand respect from others? At least the so-called lower castes, in order to avail the benefits of reservation, have to achieve certain minimum qualifications, unlike the so-called upper castes. 

P.S: Have not the Hindus committed treason against their own country in the interest of their caste?

Returning after a very long time

I think it's almost a year since I wrote anything. I have just lost the excitement and interest to write and share my thoughts with anyone at all. Right now at 00.24 AM, I am just forcing myself to write whatever is coming to my mind.

I often wonder, what should I write about? But, I get no answer. Maybe it is better to just write whenever something comes to my mind but then those are just fragmented thoughts having no coherency at all.

Maybe, I am writing just because I am a lot disturbed today. And more often than not it's the casteism of this society in which I am forced to live that makes me feel so. Sometimes I feel like a Jew living among Nazis. The same fear of being discovered or asked about your caste. The same fear of persecution and humiliation, of being told every now and then that you are worth nothing.

Whenever I searched for a house for renting, I was fearful that I would be asked about my caste and indeed it was asked. But this time, to get a decent house, I had to circumvent the truth. Instead of lying, I did not say anything and let them assume what they wanted to. I don't know how would they react once they find out.

But it is lying nevertheless, of not being able to live freely without any fear of confronting your identity.

I don't think this country will ever change. These people just want to even deny the fundamental rights to the people of their own country and when the government does something to help through affirmative actions, they say that that is unfair, "Earn your position". Well, guess what you did not even leave them with enough confidence to even believe in themselves that they are also as good as you are but instead since birth told them that they belong to the gutter.

Even then I say let's compete on merit, give up your caste names and ban caste.

Update: In the end, I actually did not take the flat instead found one where the landlord did not care to ask about caste.

How much is enough?

What am I thinking? I don’t know. In fact, I think I have stopped thinking. I seem to be becoming more of a worldly person. Sort of settling down. Bigger flat on rent to accommodate my siblings and spending money frugally and budgeting every single rupee.

Don’t know what really is going through my mind. I worry a lot about what is left in account, how much do I owe, how much do others owe to me and how can I get it back, do I have back up for emergency, can I afford a car right now, should I get a sofa set, a refrigerator, etc or should I wait a bit. I never used to think this way. Something seems to have happened to me. I am also thinking of accumulating more and more things. My mind is always involved in making schemes so that I can make money or invest somewhere which can give good return.

And, there happens to be a tremendous surge in these desires whenever I happen to look at those small EMIs on online shopping sites tempting me and telling me that I can afford those expensive things. That it is good to enjoy even if it means to be in debt.

May be these thoughts were always inside me, maybe I was just deceiving myself into believing that I am untouched by the temptation of material accumulation. Don’t know.

Yet, despite of all this, it just takes a moment to break this delusion of happiness, of this dream of material comfort to fade away like wisps of smoke, if only I happen to put my gaze into those cramped and filthy shanties, full of labors and their family, spread outside my apartments, with no sanitary arrangements and with no light or water supply. The very people who are directly laboring and working to create these apartments do not even get enough so that they can at least manage a decent way of life.

Who is responsible for this? Me, who is wondering how to get more material even after having enough to live and survive or the one who lives in shanties and cannot even make sure that his womenfolk & children have access to safe toilets?

Rashsundari Debi (1809-1900)

“I would start working at dawn, and I would still be at it until well beyond midnight. I had no rest in between. I was only fourteen years old at the time. I came to nurture a great longing: I would learn to read and I would read a religious manuscript. I was unlucky, in those days women were not educated. Later, I began to resent my own thoughts. What is wrong with me? Women do not read, how will I do it? Then I had a dream: I was reading the manuscript of Chaitanya Bhagabat (the life of a saint)… Later in the day, as I sat cooking in the kitchen, I heard my husband say to my eldest son: “Bepin, I have left my Chaitanya Bhagabat here. When I ask for it, bring it in.” He left the book there and went away. When the book had been taken inside, I secretly took out a page and hid it carefully. It was a job hiding it, for nobody must find it in my hands. My eldest son was practising his alphabets at that time. I hid one of them as well. At times, I went over that, trying to match letters from that page with the letters that I remembered. I also tried to match the words with those that I would hear in the course of my days. With tremendous care and effort, and over a long period of time, I learnt how to read…”

Later, because of her incessant desire to read and learn, she was able to teach herself the alphabets and then read the Chaitanya Bhagabat.

This was the experience of Rashsundari Debi who was born in a so-called Hindu upper caste, landed family in colonial Bengal, some 200 years ago, when it was believed that if a woman acquired an education then it would bring bad luck to her husband and become a widow. Only at the age of twelve, she was married to an affluent landlord. She came to have twelve children and thus the inescapable responsibility of running a large household. There were days when she had not a moment’s rest, no time even to sit down and eat. In spite of such a hostile and adverse environment, she secretly taught herself to read at the age of twenty-five and to write at the age of fifty, defying all social conventions and obstacles.

Despite household chores and the demands of the many children she bore, she finally succeeded in writing her autobiography, Amar Jiban, at the age of 73, perhaps the first autobiography ever to be written in the Bengali language and certainly the first by a Bengali woman and maybe the first by an Indian woman.

Situations have changed a lot since then yet there are people and some are my so-called modern friends only who still hold fast to the idea that the kitchen is for a woman only and a man should never take a step inside unless the woman is unavailable, though they are not at all averse to the idea of her bringing in some money by working in an MNC or even better in a Govt Organisation.

Courtesy: NCERT and the World Wide Web

Ghost Speech

The following was posted by someone on Facebook and is being claimed as the speech given by Vladmir Putin, the Russian president, to the Duma (Russian Parliament), about tensions with minorities in Russia:

"In Russia live Russians. Any minority, from anywhere, if it wants to live in Russia, to work and eat in Russia, should speak Russian, and should respect the Russian laws. If they prefer Sharia Law, then we advise them to go to those places where that's the state law. Russia does not need minorities. Minorities need Russia, and we will not grant them special privileges, or try to change our laws to fit their desires, no matter how loud they yell 'discrimination'. We better learn from the suicides of America, England, Holland and France, if we are to survive as a nation. The Russian customs and traditions are not compatible with the lack of culture or the primitive ways of most minorities. When this honorable legislative body thinks of creating new laws, it should have in mind the national interest first, observing that the minorities are not Russians.

Truth be told, then there exist no records to validate if this speech was ever made by Mr. Putin. However, this blog post is not being written to investigate the existence of this speech, it is in-fact just a reproduction of the comments that followed the above post. It is upon the reader to draw their own conclusions.

Comments:-

A: You are right [Name]. Time demands a change in our approach, if we have to survive.

Me: Sir, Vladmir Putin never made such a speech, its a hoax. There are no news reports available to claim the veracity of existence of this speech. And, regarding the message being conveyed through this speech, it is one of intolerance and certainly should not be welcome. The problem with our country is not that we are being over-tolerant or appeasing but inefficient, lazy and narrow-minded.

B: Before claiming this as a hoax, you check net and search for putin's speech in Feb. You will find many links of newspapaers. Regarding the speech, i think time has come to talk beyond religion, caste, creed in our country and show Mulayam, Maya, Mamata and others road to their extinction. These politicians are thriving on such issues at the cost of country.

Me: I forgot to mention "credible" news reports...does BBC report, does The Guardian say something, does the New York Times or even our very own The Times of India report anything??....and, Yes sir, I agree with you on that, 'time has come", and those politicians certainly needs to change their ways or get extinct. That was my whole point politicians are using appeasement, vote-politics to further their cause only. What I want is a reasonable and fair approach in government policies. What this message conveys is disrespect and intolerant attitude towards the culture, religion of the so-called minorities. I only demand reason and fairness, that's it.

C: Great Putin! He is a true leader; He has foresight and moral courage; He is a true patriot; India needs to have such masculine leaders!!

C: [Name], you are great;

C: I don't think there is any intolerance in Putin's statement, as somebody here predicates; A Muslim leader in Hyderabad openly threatens to quash the Hindu culture; That Muslim leader claims that he has even stamped out the normal temple activities such as chiming the bell, during Deity-worship in the Bhagya-Laxmi Temple of the city; To deal with such so called minorities, a Putin-like leader is urgently required in India;

Me: Putin might feel odd knowing that he is being hailed for a speech that he never gave. Regarding the previous comment, a Muslim leader agitates a disaffected crowd and goes on rampage and the whole of community is branded as such; similarly when RSS or VHP go on a rampage the whole of Hindu community is branded as such. This point that one or two people or an organized unit do not make up the general make up of the whole community is not being understood by anyone. Its not about a Muslim or a Hindu doing something, its about a bad person doing bad deed, that's what this is about. Put them in prison and let them rot. I don't know where the religion figures here. And that message, what that conveys is highly dangerous; it says to ostracize the whole of community based on religion or whatever social factor is there. That is what I am against, the disrespect of culture of people who are different from us. It’s just like that Muslim leader who has no respect for our culture and similarly there are "truth-seekers" who have no respect for their culture. An eye for an eye.

C: What {name} says is an ideal approach to the situation; This rarely happens in a real world;

Me: I really don't get it, what's ideal approach. It seems to be suggested from the previous comment that if an anti-social element from one community commits a crime then other should persecute the whole of the masses from former community. What is to be done then? Carry out your actions the way the message says, 1). they should speak the language the majority speaks, 2) make laws with suitability for majorities only, 3) force customs and culture on them - resulted in unrest in Sri Lanka, Pakistan, Refugees in Myanmar, CHECHENS IN RUSSIA, and it is endless - is it really what we want? - and it will continue till somebody decides with a calm mind that we should discuss and solve problems. I am proud of my country where lived such Men and Women of foresight who made this country what it is, there lived many cultures, many religions, like different colors of a rainbow and so long will they as there continue to take birth such Men and Women, irrespective of religion, caste, creed, and color. I think lets agree to disagree, because there seems no end to this discussion.